Current Real Life

Oh, hey. Let me sit down here and tell you real stuff.

Every time I’ve started writing lately, I get distracted by thoughts of, “Is this okay to write? Will this offend someone? Is this supposed to look more professional? Will a bigger platform pick this up? Do people need to know what I bought from the Nordstrom sale? Is my curling iron on from this morning? Do I need to write about blah blah blah on my blog? #ontheblog? Holy crap, am I thinking in hashtags?” I get a little stage fright and scrap it all.

Orrrr, I just get distracted, period.

Past about 9:00, it’s over. That’s when I stand in the shower, which is like some kind of time warping black hole, and I always seem to get out about…an embarrassing amount of time later.

(I am not saving water, but I don’t wash my hair that often, so, I’ll call it a draw.)

After my shower, I take out my contacts and inevitably pick my face for twenty minutes.

That’s my night.

Tonight, though, I want to write about my day. It was uninteresting to most, but with a crazy next couple of weeks, I was SO thrilled to have an entire, open scheduled day with my little best buddies. We went to Sonic, dumped Ocean Water drinks all over the car (and ceiling..?) before we even arrived to our destination, and wandered Home Goods.

My POI (point of interest) of the day was me crying in Home Goods. Actual tears. That’s because a.) Home Goods is sacred, and b.) Gus and Roscoe in awe of all the toys made me tear up. Sometimes I forget how little they are! Their teeny hands holding potentially new coloring books, bending down to examine them in the little squat only the youngest kids can do. They both looked like babies next to the towering shelves of toy cars. Are they not babies, though? They’re just teeny little guys, yet Gus is starting school next month! How did this happen?!

I turned my head from the Home Goods toy shelves and there were BACKPACKS! They’re ruining summer! They were lined up in all their glory behind the infant section. How fitting. Just so poignantly appropriate. So symbolic! Let it stand as painful foreshadowing to all the new moms shopping for newborn footie pajamas–emoji backpacks are looming closely behind! It was tender and heartbreaking and I just love my boys so much, and that’s when I started crying.

Of course, I bought my boys the B-listed, running-out-of-battery toys they wanted, and told myself that guy Bryan from The Bachelorette’s crazy mom is just so relatable. So misunderstood.

(I also bought newborn blankets because I have a lot of feelings (and a dozen friends having babies), as well as a sparkly lunchbox for myself to take to work. I’ll match all the Lisa Frank-deprived seven year olds of 2017.)

I’m borderline flipping out about school starting this year. This is the beginning. It’s starting. The schedules! The homework! Outside influences! Missing my kids at school! My friends tell me I won’t miss them…but what if I do? I will! Should I sort out my expired teaching license to stalk my kids forever?

I’m getting all weepy that our almost four year long, never ending summer is coming to an end. I never want my “supers” to grow up. (And I never want to really care if all my #ontheblog photos are professional.)

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2 Comments

  1. I am totally with you! My first “super” is going to kindergarten and I am dying. I even held him back a year I can’t hold him another year bc he would be weird to the kids then. Haha. I hate that they’re growing so fast. No wonder some ladies have 9 kids.

  2. You will absolutely miss them. People who say they don’t are crazy! I hate school starting and the routine. I revel in summer and having my kids all to myself. I curse Walmart every July when they start getting out school supplies. Anyway. Not trying to be a buzz kill. Just saying I feel you 😩😭

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